ok folks…here is how I upgraded my SQL server 2008 R2 instance to the version SCCM requires
SQL Server 2008 R2 with SP1 and with a minimum of Cumulative Update 6
First, lets download CU6 from here.
After installing CU6 the SQL log file shows that I have this version:
Microsoft SQL Server 2008 R2 (SP1) - 10.50.2811.0 (X64)
So that equates to SP1 CU #6 (2679367) Apr 16, 2012
Ok so that should satisfy the requirements of SCCM 2012.